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Loose the Booze

Hey blogger world, I have been granted somehow this opportunity to contribute from time to time some of my blogs to this site and I am grateful. I take this guest blogging very seriously, I hope my writing reaches those that need to hear my real-world experiences. Everyone has a story to share and this sounds cliche -- but it is the human reality of it all. I am no more important than the man cleaning the parking lot of a motel. The only difference might be that I have acquired the ability to share my experiences through this media called blogging. Ironically, if you can believe me I used to hate school work and reading/writing was my most dreaded subject up until 8th grade. 

What happened in 8th grade? I was privileged enough to be placed with a hard core English teacher and she drilled essay writing for nearly two months. The results were incredible, as she asked me what I would like to eat for lunch at Olive Garden, because I was among-st the very few students who score a 6.0 on their FCAT writing -- which is a perfect score. I still remember that day so vividly, her calling out my name and me physically seeing that 6.0 next to my name I just could not believe it. I know I wrote the essay with all that she had taught us, but never really considered the possibility of obtaining a 6.0. It was also a remarkable experience because the school took us in a limousine -- that was my very first time in a limousine.

My perfect score really boosted my confidence going forward academically and although English was never my favorite subject -- I did strive to do my best. Now, as a thirty year old, I do enjoy reading non-fiction true stories and obviously writing blogs. I only mentioned this part of my background to show you things can change even when you hate them the most. I have always been open and blunt about my life’s journey and if you visit my main blog page you can definitely get more context on this statement.

However, I do not want to disregard the subject of this blog. In life you receive many advice, but none more prominent than, “bad company corrupts good morals.” As a believer, I grew up knowing alcoholism was detrimental and it brings no good. Yet, I stupidly thought I could just keep associating with those that consumed it by being just a viewer and not a participant. After an altercation with words with my mother, I decided I needed some company to vent and cool off. I couldn’t have chosen a worse peer group that night. One of those peers was so allured by the notion I had never been intoxicated with alcohol -- that he could not believe at my age of 28 I had never been drunk or had consumed alcohol in general -- he made sure he targeted me by peer pressure. I had no clue what I was doing, but they laughed and marveled on how quickly I lost control. Next day, I woke up with Hangover part III and IV. I vowed it was never to happen again and that I had learned my lesson.

A few days passed by and the main peer told me the biggest lie alcoholism can tell you, “oh you don’t have to get drunk -- you can just drink enough until you feel tipsy.” I was reluctant to try it, but once again --”bad company corrupts good morals” -- I caved in and consumed just a few beers. I did notice the difference and was surprised at how much better my body responded to the alcohol. At this time, I was going through one of the toughest moments of my life emotionally and spiritually I couldn’t have been more cold. I seemed to bury my faith and ignore all that I knew from my upbringing. Feeling tipsy felt all bubbly and harmless, so I sporadically kept indulging in this consumption. As weeks and months passed by I realized it had become a “social norm” and that I wasn’t doing anything wrong.

However, that’s exactly what the enemy wants you to think. Alcohol is a drug, it consumes you from the inside out and despite scientists trying to justify it -- it can’t be. Just because you aren’t getting drunk it doesn’t mean you are not filling your body with a toxin and more importantly contaminating your soul. Sure it feels temporary good and relaxing, but the flesh is weak and every sinful thing feels the same way. For a very long time over almost 2 years, I kept justifying it myself to keep that peers’ approval and his company. In the end, I never really had his approval or his attention -- I was just another avenue through which he got free booze from -- and that was devastating to accept. While I was tipsy, I made too many horrifying personal choices and so many ill-advised decisions I would take them all back. Absolutely NOTHING good came from consuming alcohol in any amounts or of any kind.

I hate to even have to accept the fact that for a period in time, I was an alcoholic, alcohol had a grip on me. I will always regret wasting my time and money on something that brought me destruction in more ways than you can think. I am embarrassed and ashamed of what I did -- while my faith was weakened and being tested. I mainly drank because I was in bad company and that is my biggest regret. No one should have to change their personality in Christ to please someone -- let alone make you feel like you’re missing out. I was never forced to drink but the peer pressure was a real thing and it did affect me even when I thought I was strong enough to resist it. So, I share my struggle with once again being sober and staying sober, because alcohol is one of those tactics Satan utilizes constantly to toy with the weak believers and a strong threshold to keep those in darkness from the light of Jesus.

If you want true spiritual healing and growth, alcohol can not be a part of your life at any cost. I’ve experienced it and trust me it is not worth it at all. You don’t have to experience something for yourself to know it is harmful, so please just stay away from alcohol and from every other temptation the devil throws your way. It is easier said than done, but with Christ all things are possible. I still have much more healing to do personally, but I pray I never again fall into alcoholism at any level.

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit...  - Ephesians 5:18 

Hope you find some comfort in my honest life struggles and come to realize just how important it is to obey God’s word and take this phrase into practice, “bad company corrupts good morals.” Stay blessed and feel free to share and comment!! Thank you!

Ana :)


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